A little poem of mine called 'Spelling'

I'm fascinated by the way
Our language comes unstuck,
When all the rules of spelling
Look as though they've run amok.

You wouldn't BOUGH to an audience,
Or swing from the BOW of a tree;
No wonder it's hard for foreigners:
It's hard for you and me !

When looking for admittance
We don't K-nock on doors;
We knock, the K is silent,
Just like the G in gnaws.

And people, places or things, to me
Were always known as nouns;
I find it odd that ladies then,
Don't sleep in their night-GOUNS.

Word endings are no better,
Just take for instance blue;
Why not EW ? I ask you now
We don't eat Irish STUE.

And double letters easily
Can set your brain a-spinning;
We put one N in losing,
And then put two in winning.

'I before E, except after C'
Was taught for years in schools;
But NEITHER VEIL nor VEIN are BEING
Obedient to the rules.

With all these contradictions
And gross anomalies,
I think I'll give up English,
And try to learn Chinese !

Well done, Jacks. Excellent. Spelling can be a nightmare for many people, even the English, because ours is one of the most difficult languages to learn.

How about starting a thread on here called Jacks' Poems, or Poems by Jacks, and put some/all your poems in the one thread? A thought?

BUT BEWARE the would-be Poets Laureate on here already.

I see you took my advice Jacks. Smashing poem. Looking forward to more

I cudunt spel for toffee
wen I went to skool
they put me at the back
and thowt I was a fool

now the clever uns
with univocity degree's
while having a dinner bun
its a nasty brain decease

I've worked me life regardless
from birth to sixty five
and never got forgivesness
from the honey bees in the hive.

Trust you!

can't help me self Mollie, I should have been a rapper but born the wrong colour

MOLLIE: I'm not sure how to do as you suggest. Do you mean for me to just keep putting my poems on this 'thread' ?

You could do that if you like, Jacks, but if you started a brand new one to put all your poems in, it will be seen for longer, as this one will eventually sink down the board. You could still put this one in your new thread as well though, but give it a new title as I suggested.

Try putting them on the hobbies section, jacks.

On that message board they will be easier to find and stay nearer to the top of the topic list.

Thanks First Mate. Glad you like it.

The old box
Whatever is on the old box
It don't matter,
Some people just sit there
Their eyes getting fatter;
Their brains being dulled
By the flickering screen,
By the adverts that urge them
To buy what they've seen;
They worship their telly
And won't move an inch;
If the house caught on fire
Well I doubt if they'd flinch.

It's a puzzle to me
How it has so much power
To keep people glued to it
Hour after hour;
Film upon film and then
Soap after soap,
With a life such as that
I don't think I could cope;
Like the old saying goes:
'They'll end up with square eyes;'
And to me it will be
No great loss, or surprise.

Some programmes can teach
I admit that it's true;
But of excellent ones
There are only a few;
Still, if children can learn
As they sit there and drool,
It's a start, 'cause they learn
Very little at school;
Had it not been invented
Not a soul would have cared;
But it was,
And the blame lies with John Logie Baird.