Photo-a-Day  (Friday, 2nd December, 2022)

He looks proper nowty!

An area of outstanding natural beauty, and the tree stump really does have a look of an old man.

There's probably a load of litter and rubbish around the other side of that old stump......

Mick is the 'Old Man of Shevington'. He's also a stump.

What a face! He looks like he’s got something trapped in his underpants.

What a troubled man! He looks like he’s got all the cares and woes of the world on his shoulders (if he had any shoulders!). Is he there for clog dancing round in May I wonder. His face looks as if it could stand clogging.

He reminds me of one of those illustrations in our "Hans Christian Andersen" of "Brothers Grimm" childhood books ; there was always a spooky forest with an old gnarled tree with a face on it.

Come to Shevvy and see the constipated tree.

So Gareth Cheetham, it won't be what you'd thunk that's around the other side of that old stump......

Irene, there's plenty of gnarled faces in a spooky place around there, it's called the Tory club.

The Shevy Man who lived in that tree never had to fight for sun and sky and air and light, but stood out in the open plain
And he always got its share of rain, but never became a forest king, but lived and died a scrubby thing.

You're right Irene, they used to use this tree as a storytelling tree if I'm not mistaken.

Correct Joan. It was initially intended to be used to sacrifice young beautiful girls to the sun god, but unfortunately none could be found in all the kingdom of Shevvyla. So instead they've used it to gather children around to tell them tall stories about Liz Truss.

Once upon a time children, there was a not-very clever lettuce called Liz. All the grown-ups thought that Liz was a bit dozy, but Liz thought she was very clever and she told the grown-ups that she was so clever that she should be made Prime Minister.
Now the grown-ups knew that Liz was more of a wet lettuce than a clever lettuce, but they decided to have a bit of a joke and pretend that Liz could be Prime Minister. Of course, they never thought that anyone would seriously believe that dozy Liz the lettuce could ever be Prime Minister, but, you know what children the grown-ups DID vote for her and she DID become Prime Minister.
Liz the lettuce was over the moon with her new job and sent for her bestist friend, Kwazy Horsesend to come and look after all the money in her new realm.
Now Kwazy Horsesend was no cleverer than Liz the lettuce, but he had a lot of fabulously rich friends so he asked them what he should do with all the realms money and they told him the bestist thing he could do with all that money was give it all to them and they would look after it for him. So Kwazy gave them all the money, but they didn't look after the money children. What do you think they did with it, boys and girls?
That's right children, they stashed it all away in foreign banks where no one could find it, and now, the grown-ups have no money to buy a Turkey for your Christmas dinner!
the moral of this story children is that when YOU grow up, never, ever ever, EVER let Liz the lettuce be Prime Minister again!.

Although , looking on the bright side children , Liz was delighted to learn that having served several weeks as a totally useless prime minister , she became automatically eligible to receive a lifetime pension equal to 50% … that’s a half … of her current annual income .
So let’s see … 160 grand per annum let’s say … divide by two …
Hands up who knows the answer …
That’s right children …
80 grand a year for doing buggerall for six weeks .
That’s a lot more than mummy and daddy earn isn’t it ?
Yes it is … and it’s a damn sight more than most of you lot are ever likely to earn in a year an’ all … I’ll tell you that much for nothin’ .

Mick, sometimes I wonder why you bother, but I glad you do.

Hey up ..., I think he's broken the record for appearing under false names in his own PaD . Congratulations .

There’s only so much you can say about the rotting old man Syd.
Everything seems to link to him, especially the fairy tales.

Hello kiddywinks, I Liz here, let us begin...
Anyhow, there I was, about mid morning-time when you were thinking of having your milk and biscuits, I Liz was trussed up like a chicken in the middle of Shevington village, and all the natives, beastly creatures, promenading round me and making faces and bawling out things - oh, it was beastly I can tell you. The Queen of hearts had pressed me into her service, and I Liz was all day in the bakeroom, helping (or hindering) her and the cook; learning to make tarts, custards and cheese-cakes and French pastry, to truss two ducks and garnish dessert-dishes. Suddenly I Liz was trussed up along with the two ducks in the form of fiddles; sausages and puddings resembling flutes and hautboys, and a breast of veal in the shape of a harp. When they had finally secured me to their satisfaction, they rolled me over on my side and then it was I Liz who saw Thérèse Coffey had also been similarly stitched up, oh I mean trussed. I Liz then awoke to find it all had been a dream - I was still Prime Minister after all and Hugh and I Liz lived happily ever after, well 44 days actually.

Just woke up and P a D has turned into Jackanory, Jackanory, Jackanory…or am I still dreaming?

You’re not the only one that wonders why he bothers Syd , given the amount of undeserved flack that he comes in for at times … I’ve asked him that very same question myself on more than one occasion in fact … That right Mick ?

Well Ozy he's only getting back the flak that he's dished out at other folks on here, they didn't deserve it either, I don't mind banter at all - in fact I love it, but Mick does cut to the bone and beyond at times. He's worked on the rigs and surely banter gets them through some very arduous shifts, so you should know some good puns Mick.

Regarding The Parboiling of Mrs Doyle's Turnips, the lines contained in it are copied and pasted from the Classics, and are found by the word 'truss' mentioned in classical literature, some words were cut out and others replaced with other more apt words. Hopefully this should appease the "Literature Buffs" out there. C.

Agreed Cyril.. I have no need to add to that …