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The Don
Started by: cordyline (4921)   Report abuse
Donald has a Trumpet

Posted by: madamehmurray (6144)   Report abuse
not sure but I knew clinton played with his sex

Posted by: britboy (6771) Report abuse
That is soooo funny .....Trump Donald, I put it on my Facebook amongst my friends in the USA

Posted by: basil brush (11512) Report abuse
the sooner the papers, and TV, over here stop going on about this mon, the better.

Posted by: cordyline (4921)   Report abuse
Did you press your left mouse button ?

Posted by: cordyline (4921)   Report abuse
During my run today someone threw a bottle of Omega 3 pills at me

but no harm done my injuries were only Super Fish Oil.

Posted by: aussie94 (1816) Report abuse
There is only one Sir Don and that is Sir Donald Bradman greatest batsman ever.

Posted by: cordyline (4921)   Report abuse
A sniper makes an assassination attempt on Donald Trump.

A member of the Secret Service's Presidential bodyguard sees the attempt just a split second before the marksman pulls the trigger.

He shouts "Mickey Mouse" at the top of his voice.

Of course Donald Trump is killed immediately.

At the Secret Service debriefing afterwards the head of Service asks the shouter "Why did you shout `Mickey Mouse'?"

"Very sorry boss" says the Service man "I meant to shout Donald, Duck"

Posted by: whacker (673) Report abuse

"That is soooo funny .....Trump Donald, I put it on my Facebook amongst my friends in the USA" BRITBOY

Don't you live in Michigan? Where thanks to President Trump coal miners out of work can now look forward to the mines opening up after Obama closed them? Where the intervention of the Donald persuaded Ford to build huge new factories rather than moving to Mexico?

A little gratitude is too much to expect, I suppose.

Posted by: whacker (673) Report abuse
Cordyline’s “joke” is reflective of the coarseness we see invading this site. Foul language and dirty jokes are the norm. When did the gutter become an accepted habitat? And now “jokes,” not for the first time, about murder, the act of extreme cruelty. OK is it, when the target is an American President? How about we all roar with laughter at the prospect of the assassination of Teresa May? Or should we all chortle at a joke about, say, the murder of Cordyline’s family members?

Perhaps the barbs are only hysterical when they are aimed at those who are not aware of them, and cannot respond. You know, the weapon of the coward.

Posted by: cordyline (4921)   Report abuse
In an exclusive interview with the Christian Broadcasting Network, Donald Trump said

"I believe in God" But of course The Donald was talking about HIMSELF ― Jay Leno

Posted by: cordyline (4921)   Report abuse
Trump is so divorced from the Truth -- he should pay it alimony.
―Elizabeth Harris Burch aka @Ladydragyn

Posted by: cordyline (4921)   Report abuse
Comic Sans walks into a bar.

"Get out of here!" shouts the barman.

"We don't serve your type"

Posted by: Platty (141) Report abuse
Whacker, he's also insisted on American steel being used and not imports. Pity none of our MPs put our people first.

Posted by: r.fisher (591)  Report abuse
When will people realize that a JOKE is exactly that,once you begin to analyse it then it isn't a joke.


Posted by: lectriclegs (3622) Report abuse
Here you go Whacker

Posted by: cordyline (4921)   Report abuse
Just before I die, I'm going to swallow a bag of popcorn kernels.

My cremation is going to be epic.

Posted by: cordyline (4921)   Report abuse
Youtube shooter identified as

"angry bodybuilding female vegan animal rights activist of Iranian descent"

....nope, nothing to work with here.

Posted by: cordyline (4921)   Report abuse
Guy arrives at the Pearly Gates and St Peter welcomes him in.
The guy notices a wall full of clocks at different times.

When he asks what that's about, St P says each one represents a person's lies.

For example, top left is Mother Teresa's - no movement, bang on 12.00.
A few clocks along is Abe Lincoln - 2 seconds gone.

"Where's Donald Trump's?" asks the guy.

"That's in Jesus' office - he's using it as a desk fan"

Posted by: cordyline (4921)   Report abuse
Stormy Daniels is doing porn again.

Say what you want about Donald Trump -- but he gets people back to work.

Posted by: cordyline (4921)   Report abuse
Trump says the Saudis are rubbish at covering things up.

I'm not so sure.

Sticking a tea towel on your head is still marginally better than a comb over.

Posted by: cordyline (4921)   Report abuse
Donald Trump meets with the Queen.
He asks her, "Your Majesty, how do you run such an efficient government? Are there any tips you can give to me?"

"Well," says the Queen "the most important thing is to surround yourself with intelligent people"

Trump frowns "But how do I know the people around me are really intelligent?"

The Queen takes a sip of tea. "Oh, that's easy. You just ask them to answer an intelligence riddle"

The Queen pushes a button on her intercom "Please send Theresa May in here, would you?"

Theresa May walks into the room. "Yes, your majesty?"

The Queen smiles. "Answer me this, please, Theresa. Your mother and father have a child. It is not your brother and it is not your sister. Who is it?"

Without pausing for a moment, Theresa answers "That would be me"

"Yes! Very good" says the Queen

Back at the White House, Trump asks to speak with Vice President Mike Pence

"Mike, answer this for me. Your mother and father have a child. It's not your brother and it's not your sister. Who is it?"

"I'm not sure" says the Vice President "Let me get back to you on that one"

Mike Pence goes to his advisers and asks every one, but none can give him an answer.
Finally, he ends up in the men's room and recognizes General McMasters' shoes in the next stall.

Mike shouts, "General! Can you answer this for me? Your mother and your father have a child and it's not your brother or your sister. Who is it?

General McMaster yells back "That's easy. It's me!"

Mike Pence smiles. "Thanks!" and goes back to the Oval Office to speak with Trump.

"Say, I did some research and I have the answer to that riddle. It's General McMaster"

Trump gets up, stomps over to Mike Pence, and angrily yells into his face, "No, you idiot! It's Theresa May!"


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