General   (General discussion, talk about anything.)

Morning to all. – Now for some humour, born out of tragedy.

This is my first viewing – this topic -since I last posted.
Parts of what are to follow – may come across or be interpreted as me being morbid – that would be wrong – as I type out this – I’m smiling to a point of laughing because I know what’s to follow.

As heart-wrenching as it was at the time when Kiely passed away – 12.30 pm 30th Oct 2001. She died at home – had one operation for cancer – was home recuperating and without warning – she passed away. Two sons & I were with her at the time – we were talking – Kiely, during these conversations, was nodding her head and smiling. Then.

The lads (all 7) asked if Ma could be “waked” at home – rather than a funeral parlour.
I agreed – no problem with that. Neighbours in and out, going up to the bedroom, staying with Kiely – saying prayers, bringing sandwiches, bringing drinks – having drinks – you know something – the Irish certainly know how to “Wake” a person. There are no invitations here, you simply turn up. That’s the scene –

Now I’ll tell you the funny parts, and there’s more than one

Having 7 children – 1 girl, 6 boys, and in that order.
One of the kids had been away – school trip – as kids do – they came back with a present for their Ma, its was a pair of pottery figures – Male & Female – The Man was holding a chicken under his arm – the woman had a bunch of carrots in her arms – they were the ugliest things you could clap your eyes on. Kiely said something about them being beautiful – she knew that I knew – they were horrible – and she placed one at each side of the bed. Her joke at the time was – when we wake up in the morning – we should look at the figures and say – well it makes you look better.
They became the brunt of many a joke between us.

Even to the point that if I went first, “they were going down with me” – likewise with Kiely.

Then came the day of the funeral – Kiely was laid-out, in her favourite clothes – and was dressed by Sherrie (daughter) and a couple of daughters-in-law.
The undertaker was a brother-in-law of Simon, one of the sons. Simon had told him, before you close the lid – dad wants to do something.
So when they were ready – they called me – I placed the 2 figures at the side of Kiely – saying “see, I told you where they were going”..

At the actual burial – and before soil and flowers were thrown down to the coffin – the next stage was – OK dad, called the lads – I went up, took out my pipe and knife – and emptied my pipe onto the coffin lid. I could hear the lads telling the people “why” this was happening – It was something that dad had always said he would do – and Kiely had worked out her own arrangements if it had been the other way around.
I could now hear people laughing – patting me on the back and shoulders. Good on ya Jack – Women could be heard saying, what they were going to do to their husbands.

The lads had made arrangements that refreshments were being served at the golf club – no joke – a couple of hundred – but that’s Ireland for you, an open invitation.

Now everyone was at the club – inside and outside. Nigel appeared holding a microphone – asking Phil – the steward – is the PA on – yeah shouted back Phil – my 7 lads got together and said, dad, WE have a present for you which YOU know Mam would dearly love you to have – it will help you to remember her, and so dad, please come up here.
Me thinking, what the feck is going on, what are they upto.
I went up, Adrian the eldest fella presented me with “THAT female figure” the undertaker had removed it after I had placed it with Kiely – then gave it to one of the sons – the lads (obviously rehearsed) shouted out – Pay Back time dad – that’s going down with you when your time comes – that’s what Mam would have wanted. Now you’ve got it. One of my sisters was crying with laughter.

Jeysus, there was more laughing from the people, than what you would get at a wedding – and this was a funeral, an Irish funeral.

I held that ugly figure high, and laughed with them – its now back at the side of my bed – where Kiely first placed it. Kiely had the last say after all. Did she?
Na its wuz them fecking sons o’mine, but with Ma looking down she would have laughed her head off.

God bless all o ya.